On August 11, I posted my weekly Taming of the Frizz about casting your cares upon God.
And after being oh-so-sure I had done that, I find myself in the same place again. I think I've conquered something, I've given it to God, I've grown up - and then I get spun around and put right back in the same heart-pounding, blood rushing in my ears, eyes blurring anger.
For once, I can agree with Paul, who writes in Romans 7:15, 18b
"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.... For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out."
Thankfully Paul does not end there, but continues in Romans 7:25 - "Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
Without God, I am not a person I want to spend time with. But thankfully, when that anger, or worry, or bitterness overtakes me, I can pray. I can cry out to God, I can give it to Him.
And you know the great thing? He keeps taking it back, no matter how many times I've offered the same issue before, He takes it back, and continues to heal me, to grow me up into the person He wishes me to be.
Post title from my punk rock days, Blink 182's "I Guess This is Growing up" If nothing else about the lyrics gets you, hear this:
It happens once again, I'll turn to a friend, someone who understands, and sees through the master plan...."